Do you possessions own you or do you own your possessions? Sounds like a simple question right? But in truth it’s quite difficult. Are your possessions important to you? Do they define you? Can you not live without them?
These are questions which would determine if you are ruled by your possessions. But some would ask, doesn’t it matter on your possession? If it is something of sentimental value or very valuable. Maybe. But I’ve found that people who treasure their possessions, value all of it. It doesn’t matter if it’s food, clothes, paper, jewelry, etc. It’s all the same. It’s the ownership of having them.
I say this because my mom keeps going on about her possessions. I feel as though it’s ruling her life. She is justifying her choices because she is a slave to her possessions. And I’ve been meeting a lot of others who are also reluctant to let go of their possessions, both young and old.
It’s something I have trouble understanding. It’s just food, clothes, or furniture. It can be replaced. My mom called me to ask about throwing away some of my old school stuff. I said dump it all. She got upset and said I value nothing. Then she mentioned all this junk which did not want or ask for.
She flipped out when I said I did not want her dinner table, couch, etc. Why is it so hard to get rid of stuff? So what if the suit you bought was $70? It’s not $70 now. And if you aren’t using it and can’t fit into it, why keep it? Or shoes, do you really need 100 pairs of shoes anymore? If not then why keep them? Where is the justification of keeping items you don’t need?
I’ve found that the hoarder mentality will extend to everything. Even junk. It gets to the point where you are working to provide for space so you can buy more things. Where a person justifies space because of their reluctance to part with possessions they don’t need, use, or really want.
But it’s wasteful. And I think that’s where the problem resides. We think of things in terms of what we spent for it. Not in terms of what it’s worth now. If you no longer need a bigger house and could use a smaller couch. Why do you need to keep 3 couches instead of 1? Or just 1 refrigerator for 2 people instead of 3?
I feel as though we define ourselves by so many materialistic things. We lose sight of what’s really important. And we compete with others for who has the most expensive stuff. And for what?
Do we really own our possessions or do they own us?
7 responses so far ↓
1 Mrs. Micah // Apr 22, 2008 at 8:06 pm
The hardest part for me to shake is the “It might come in handy later” mentality. Especially if I don’t feel I got my money’s worth. But I’ve had to tell myself—perhaps, but I can live without it.
2 Jim ~ mydebtblog.com // Apr 22, 2008 at 9:19 pm
There’s a quote from the movie Fight Club, “The things you own end up owning you.” I try not to have too much personal attachment to things because it’s just stuff. Hanging on to a lot of things just for the sake of having things is dumb. Same with space and owning a much larger house than you need is wasted space. More space to furnish, heat, cool, light, and it may not be frequently used. We’re all going to evaluate the question differently though. One thing that is for certain, the one who dies with the most toys is still dead.
3 Meg from FruWiki and All About Appearances // Apr 23, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I have a to-do list on Remember the Milk entitled “Stuff Management” that’s all about what needs to be moved or fixed or cleaned, etc.– and it doesn’t include shopping, routine chores, home/yard improvements, work, or other to-do’s . It has definitely opened my eyes, and helped me add more to the yard sale pile. I’m not looking forward to going through the yard sale pile next week, but I’ll be glad to have it all out of here one way or another on May 3rd.
4 Mom @ Wide Open Wallet // Apr 23, 2008 at 4:17 pm
I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of Flylady but she talks about this type of thing a lot. She says that it comes from not trusting yourself to be able to provide. That you feel you need to keep stuff around “in case” because you don’t trust yourself to be able to provide it again if you need it later. It’s an interesting theory.
btw: I own my stuff. It doesn’t own me.
5 Carol Terry // Apr 23, 2008 at 9:04 pm
You are so smart and so right! To know all this at your age means you have a great future ahead of you! I bow to your wisdom!
6 LivingAlmostLarge // Apr 24, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Definitely, never heard about stuff being kept just in case.
Trust me my mom justifies the food by saying it’s in case there is a war. I tell her um, without electricity you won’t be able to run 3 fridge/freezers. She was stumped.
7 Future Millionaire // Apr 27, 2008 at 10:38 pm
My mom’s the same way - probably a little worse than yours so I can totally relate.
I was watching TV today and there’s previews for Dr. Phil for Monday which is about hording of possessions. Normally not a Dr. Phil watcher but the topic caught my eye so I have the DVR set to record.
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